Cleared.

Went to USS yesterday, super fun! Spammed the rides till dizzy but forced myself to work today though I was feeling sick and super tired.

Been working for roughly 10 days now and I have to say, it is quite enjoyable. With raminder around, all the guailan jokes helps pass the day and even make it more enjoyable. Got multiple cuts from the penknife today though, probably by the dizziness. Heh.

During work, I had the sudden idea to clear all my questions. I am glad that I did. I expected and got the answers I wanted. Not sure about the other, but I can finally don't care anymore.

Family went back to Malaysia. Again. Argh, used to it.

Probably getting my pay tomorrow, and will be able to buy something I wanted for quite awhile now..

That's all, still tired, gonna rest for today.

Title

Just a little post to write how I feel up to this point, especially with the O'level starting in a few days time - Science practical not withstanding - , I can't even find an appropriate title for this post..

I am not prepared. I am confused. I am worried. I am scared. I have a certain feeling of needing to repeat my O'level. It is not too late. Yet. However, with the little time I have, I won't be able to improve enough to be able to enter my desired course. Sure I have studied, everyday in fact. But still, my confidence is slowly seeping out of my hands. I still have many things left half done, but can't find the motivation to continue.

Not just O'levels, people around me have change so much this past 10 months. Including me. Maybe I am getting paranoid, but I feel that I am missing something. Can't tell what, but I am too scared to ask.

I hate to write this out, but I feel so stressed out. My family ain't helping either. Right now, they are selling our house just for their convenience. Me? They just tell me to put up with whatever room they are going to push me to - It is not like their going to live with me anyways. Besides that, they are even asking me what good I am to them. Clearly I am a burden, but still, I am still a student. What can I do right now?

I try to appear cheerful when I head out, not like people will care if I seemed upset, but I don't want to spoil the mood. People around me are ridiculing me too. I am aware of that. But I don't hate anyone. If I am being disliked upon by others or ignored, it is because of me right? Maybe I done something wrong.. I don't really know.

I have been studying these past few weeks, whenever I feel calm and relaxed. The moment I am going to freak out, I on my computer and play some games to distract myself. To tell the truth, I've been unable to sleep. Constantly tossing around, only to get up and watch some animes.

In 2 days time, the O'level English paper will be due. I am prepared for that, the rest? I don't know and I can't really say.

I hope my father will talk to me properly again, or at least acknowledge me as his son. That is the least he should do since he is constantly demanding me to treat him like my father. As for my mother, I am just going to be careful around her and watch my actions. Hope she'll stay the same.

I want the O'levels to end as soon as possible. I need to get a job too. Right now, I am depending on raminder's father to hand me a part time job, I hope things goes as plan as I don't quite know who to turn to for a job that pays at least $40 a day.

My my, I am writing more than expected! Thank god not much ( if at all ) people read this! Just need somewhere to dump this upon. I am really tired now. Of everything.

As for now, I will continue putting a cheerful face, keep things inside and maybe "guai lan" a person or two. My plans for the future seems rather bleak for now. Maybe It'll brighten up soon.

Yeah, that will be nice wouldn't it?

Just a little scribble here: I still remember the first time I said: " I can wait forever." Am I being foolish? Maybe I should just give up? 
Nah, an oath is an oath. I may probably end up looking like a fool, but whatever. It is not like I am not treated as one right now.
And, if nothing happens, its fine. Ain't expecting anything from this point on anyway right.
Damn, I want to go poly asap..

O'Level sure die.

Just got back prelim results and.. All fail except for English and Chinese. Pathetic right? If I do not improve or work hard, my *insert title name here*.

Anyway, just did English 'O' oral today and I felt quite good, but it was short. Was I okay, bad, or did they just don't want to test me?? Aiya, over means over already. Time to rest.

Two days sick!! =(

Been sick for 2 days already and I'm feeling so so bored and tired.

Anyway, I realized that I have not blog in a very long time so...... Hi! =)

Started studying for my O'levels already (Wow!), so hopefully there would be a drastic change in my results cause I'm gonna need it..

Oh well, time to rest. Gonna force myself to go to school tomorrow no matter how sick I feel.

I'm back!!!

Yay! I'm back in singapore already and finally is able to use the internet.Although only in malaysia I am able to eat awesome meals and have lots of my stuffs there =(.Time for me to start focusing on my Dnt journal for the remainder of my school june holiday and to buck up on my studies for science and math. I hope my O'level score is good, imagine having to repeat another year! Argh!

Homed in my 2nd Home!

Hi! Haven't blogged in awhile, heh. So right now I am in Malaysia and will be staying for a week! Everyday keep playing my electric guitar while my mother (Tries to) teach me piano =). But 2 days already and I feel sososo bored here! But at least there is a lot of food! Have not eaten a proper meal in Singapore and now I can finally gorge myself in lots of food! Sure will have a lot of pimples when I come back, you'll see. Till then I shall continue eating.

Ps: Mook Ching was right, the internet service here sucks and is expensive, I paid 135RM for 5 days worth of                                     internet that has a max speed of 50kb/s.

Pss: ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: [TOTAL FATASS]

Psss: Got bad result for report slip.. Sian, 70th position out of 82..

A little awesome guitar solo.

Yiruma - Love hurts. This piece is one of my favourite as the sounds compliments the title and also gives a feeling of lost and pain.

I am Lazy!

Do you that feeling where you know that you should start to study/work but you just keep putting it off? Yeah.. Laziness seem to be in every part of me. MYE is just around the corner along with O'level. (Gosh!) I'm totally not fully prepared yet.. Damn you cursed education system.. Oh well time to do my Dnt course work.. 

Hello Hello!

Random post! So anyway I was thinking for some time now and I was like What The Heck! During these past few months, lots of things happened: love sparkles, hypocrites, gays and third parties. I have only one thing to say: Think/act carefully and not to judge too quickly. This applies to every one including me. Its okay to have fun but studies should be more important. O'levels are drawing near and teachers are trying to help us. 5 more months and you can finally do all the crap you want, but for now.. control.

*This post is intended to motivate me to study. Those who know my personal life, just to let you know, you got problem with me just tell me. I wont even fight, no point hinting/talking behind my back. Just tell me.
**When I wrote gays, I am not referring to any body from class 4A okay?
***Just to clear some doubts, feelings wont change, but I wont interfere as that would result in a silly fight. Let people chose, know where you stand.
****you made it this far.. Cool! 

Off topic: Koi's Green tea macchiato is delicious!
             

Give in or fight?

If you had a quarrel with one of your friends over a person or object , would you give in, or game on? I would choose give in. Theres no point fighting and causing hatred if a person does not chose you. In fact, giving in not only avoid hurting all parties involved but also inform you of your stand/position. So what if you lose? Either you wait, or you move on. I will not disclose what option I chose.

On another topic: I got new guitar strings today plus a thumb pick! All thanks to Danny who helped me buy it.
Now my guitar sounds damn nice and I am now learning 'Yiruma - Love Hurts' A video demo with the song sheet for both guitar and piano can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siKnhYDRiQ4
(watch it, its nice =D)

BB - The end.

Today is finally the last official parade that I have to attend before I can start on my study break. ( Yay! ) Finally got promoted to corporal and got a little note from Ricky. Officer Justin gave me a little 'pep' talk on the importance of having no excuses. ( Hate him sia say he disappointed in me, should be the other way round. ) Danny mom left after the award giving suddenly ( I think because he never see her son promoted so got up and left. jk ) Well, goodbye BB, won't miss you :)

Wah lao

I think I got severe bad luck, lost Dnt file, Blur sontong for math test, tripped and fall flat on my nose and so on and so forth. What to do sia.. Missed you Btw..

Misunderstandings

So I have misunderstood multiple things, from relations to my own messed up feelings. At least today I got it out of my system :). Weather she will eventually accept me or not, I will wait. No point in me sulking when I have a reason to continue happily : that she knows the truth. Oh well, we are so messed up.. Time will reveal itself. Oh, and if you are reading this, remember that I wont give up.

Lost

So I have lost everything, My hopes, My files, My results and my L.. Everything. I gotta have to do something fast, and quick before all things run loose

The last time

Got totally bad results for my common test:
English - C6
Math - E8
DnT - D7
Physics - E8
Chemistry - F9
Though I have not gotten my social studies paper yet , if I continue at this rate I will not be able to even qualify for Poly... Not only do I feel that I let myself down , but I felt that I have left teachers and parents feeling disappointed in me. From now , this will be the last time i will fail any of my test!
Time for me to buck up and Jia Yu!!!!!

Pains and Heartbreaks

Been spending time thinking and finally decide that it is best to let go and forget. While the pain and heartbreaks will still be there, I just want you to be happy. Whether it is with me or with someone else, I'm fine with it. I have no regrets in loving you....

Alright!!! XD *short post*

Feel the love guys! Its valentines day (woo!) But alas I feel sick...:(
Love sick XD (hehe!)

Edit: Thanks for all the gifts!!! They were all awesome :)

Tomorrow is Monday!!! SIANZ...

Things not done:
Social studies homework
Dnt homework
Math homework
Get money for Olevels

Damn... This is gonna be a tough week for me...Time to sleep

HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi everybody! Decided that it's time for me to try my hand at blogging :P Tell me what you think and on how I can improve ok??? Whether if you think it is awesome or if i should burn in hell ( Ok maybe not that harsh alright?) , TELL ME!!